if i can run in heels then i can drive
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
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I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
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I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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