are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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