Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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