I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
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