I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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