It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
