Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
