Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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