eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Rumble strips road head = magical
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
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