i would punch a child for taco bell
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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