my vag is so smooth its legendary
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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