I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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