I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I have poison ivy on my dick
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
you're hired as official boob wrangler
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.