Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?