I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
