yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
