Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
