Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Randomize
