(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Randomize
