His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
I smell like Dick and happiness
Randomize
