i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Is Oprah even human
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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