I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize