it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
and you fell through a lawn chair
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
