I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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