i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
