Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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