you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
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