u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
