I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
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