woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Randomize
