I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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