That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize