she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
