thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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