Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Randomize