I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
