how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Randomize