Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
Randomize
