i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
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he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
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I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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