the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
