you're like a bully in the Christmas story
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize
