got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
