lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Randomize
