I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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