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• (314): View more from Missouri

  I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"

  (1-513): View more from Ohio

  You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.

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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  When are you freeeeeeeeee?

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.

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• (336): View more from North Carolina

  16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay

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  21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn

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• (602): View more from Arizona

  either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.

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• (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.

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• (803): View more from South Carolina

  High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.

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• (757): View more from Virginia

  You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  you texted me "dude im face"

  (301): View more from Maryland

  it sounded so right at the time

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  19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”

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• (512): View more from Texas

  Whats your number? 5 or more?

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.

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• (505): View more from New Mexico

  Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.

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• (512): View more from Texas

  So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control

  (737): View more from Texas

  we are the apple cider girls!

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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  I just told a bottle to be chill

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  and meant it

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• (787): View more from Puerto Rico

  come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues

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• (416): View more from Toronto

  So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.

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