So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
