so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Drunk is a universal language darling
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Randomize
