just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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