We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
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