Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
The struggles of a small town man whore
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
