Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
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