i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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