these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
