I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I'm experimenting with sincerity
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
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