i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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